Finding My True Self

In our latest blog post, Dominican Volunteer Rosanna Fiasche shares how she is discovering herself and her ministry and community.

Rosie serves as a counselor at Immaculate Conception Academy Cristo Rey High School in San Francisco California.

Hello Everyone!

Six months ago or so, I made the decision to leave my family in Chicago to travel halfway across the United States to San Francisco,California to spend a year of my life as a volunteer. Who knew that three months in, that I would fall in love with San Francisco and ICA. Before I left for San Francisco, I made a promise to myself that I was going to step out of my comfort zone and go on adventures. My first weekend, before my ministry even started, I walked all over my neighborhood from checking out the beautiful murals throughout the streets to walking all the way to Castro just to check out the Rainbow Crosswalk. I have even went hiking near the ocean with a previous DV. I have been on plenty of adventures since arriving in SF. I have never lived away from home before,so this is my first time experiencing something new and chasing my dream to serve others. I put myself first and I have not regretted one moment. With the support of my family and friends I embarked on a journey of finding my true self.

Rosie Fiasche

This year I am working at Immaculate Conception Academy, which is an all-girl Cristo Rey High School. When I graduated from college I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life but being in this community so far as confirmed that I want to work with young women. Being a Cristo Rey high school, the students go to work once or twice a week to help pay their tuition. I have many roles in ICA and one of them is chaperoning with the students every morning to their work. So I get a chance to interact with each grade level has been awesome and to be honest it makes me feel so old even though I am only 23, but I love it because they keep me in the loop with everyday society. They continually bless my life and keep me laughing throughout the day. There is this one student who I absolutely love. She always makes me laugh during commute and she is so smart. It is refreshing to see the world through her eyes. It is these moments where I appreciate my life. I may complain about waking up early every morning to commute with these girls everyday but secretly I love it because it gives me the chance to interact with the girls and get a glimpse of who they can become. My main job though at ICA is working in the guidance office. I have more of an assistant role in the office, where I run notes and do little projects for the counselors. For example I work on the bulletin boards we have (which I have to say are pretty great). Here is one of the boards, that the counselors and I worked on together in the beginning of the school year.  I also created a video about the freshwomen field trip to Holy Names University in Oakland, CA. (Check out our youtube channel to watch it- ICA Cristo REY Guidance Department) Each task I work on helps each counselor in so many ways because there is only two of them but 300 something students. Another role I took on is helping out with the food program, which does not sound so glamorous but it can be really fun to watch how the girls interact with each other and how they interact with me. The freshwomen at ICA are something else. They continually keep me on my toes, that is for sure. I do not regret one moment of choosing to work with this community. Many people may think I am crazy to want to work with high school girls, but for me this is a blessing.

In spirit of Thanksgiving, here are 10 things I am grateful for:

1.    My ICA Community

2.    For my 9 lovely Dominican Sisters who are always watching out for me and made me feel welcomed as soon as my feet hit the ground.

3.    The support of my family

4.    My fellow DV’s (Liz, Sean, Jake, and Lacey)

5.    Allison and Megan for the things they do for us

6.    For the city of San Francisco for just being its great self.

7.    My friends who continually push me to follow my dreams

8.    I am grateful for the love of God and all that he has provided for me

9.    My students who teach me something new everyday

10.  Lastly, for my mom because I know how difficult it is for her baby girl to be so far away from home. Thanks for letting me pursue this crazy dream of mine.

Happy Turkey Day,

Rosie <3

Living in Relationship and Interconnectedness

August 8, 2018
Feast of St. Dominic

Allison Beyer

DVUSA Orientation Commissioning Mass

Mariandale Retreat Center

DVUSA Codirector Allison Beyer

In today’s Gospel (MT 15: 21-28) we meet a woman who has a name but her name was not recorded. Her name, like millions of women before and after her, is lost to us. Her actions and impact are not. It is precisely because of her audacity and persistence that she is remembered and recorded in our Holy book.

[Let’s recap; in 1-2 minutes in your own words tell the person next to you what you just heard in the Gospel. Take turns. The first person to listen will then add anything that the first person might have forgotten or left out.]

When I realized this was the Gospel for today I thought “Oh no! This is my least favorite Gospel!!” That’s why I thought we could start by looking at it together-- to practice bringing things that are difficult to our community, to practice our Dominican value of study and contemplation in community.

I’ll share with you how I hear this Gospel. First, everytime I hear or read this passage, I feel heavy in my heart, anxious in my stomach. It is an uncomfortable scene and one that is difficult for me to return to.

The woman, who has a name but we do not know it, goes to Jesus on behalf of her daughter who is being tormented by a demon.

Sometimes, some days, some years--we are this woman. We are desperate for healing, for answers, for action. Our desperation and love for another or our own very lives makes us bold. We do not shrink before a crowd of critics. We would walk any mile, go any distance, speak out and advocate until we make the need heard and known.

Call to mind a time when you were desperate on behalf of another or yourself. Remember how this desperation feels in your body. Your head. Your chest. Your gut. Your hands.

Sometimes, some days, some years--we are the daughter. We are utterly vulnerable. We are dependent on the ability, privilege, voice, decision, power of someone else. We are dominated by brokenness. Physical challenges, depression, anxiety, rage, grief, illness, exhaustion, poverty, marginalization. Perhaps we are even unable to seek the help we so desperately need to be well, to be integrated. We rely on the assistance of of another to get by. It is difficult to imagine in the thick of our brokenness that we won’t always be tormented day after day. Joy--the joy that we hear of in the first reading (JER 31:1-7), praising God with tambourine and dance, is unfathomable, out of reach. If we had experienced it before, it is now nothing but a memory.

Call to mind a time when you were tormented by your brokenness. Remember how this feels in your body. Your head. Your chest. Your gut. Your hands.

The woman goes to Jesus on behalf of her daughter. She is ignored.

He doesn’t even respond.

The disciples are annoyed. The woman won’t stop talking, trying to get to Jesus, making a scene. She is not even Jewish. Who does this woman think she is?

Sometimes, some days, some years--we are the disciples. We find ourselves in a position of power, of security. We belong to the majority group, our identity is valued and protected. We are able to determine who is allowed “in” or “out” of our group. We cling to this identity because it is comfortable, because it is familiar, because it is safe. If we insulate ourselves, we can maintain some semblance of peace, order and stability.

Call to mind a time in your life when you were comfortable in you your security and opted to tune out or avoid others different from yourself. Remember how living in a defensive state of fear and protection feels in your body. Your head. Your chest. Your gut. Your hands.

The disciples decide to get rid of the problem--the woman is the problem. Disrupting their peace and mission. The woman persists.

Jesus, the Good Teacher, finally responds.

“I’ve got other things to do.” “I’m too busy.” “Your daughter is not my concern, not my problem.”

Sometimes, some days, some years--we are Jesus here. We are focused, determined, heaven-bent on fulfilling a challenging plan that demands all of our attention and energy so as to not become disheartened or back out. We have carefully, and maybe even painfully, discerned our path and we will be undeterred until we reach our goal. Our resolve is strong and our vision myopic. It is nearly impossible to take in new information, so set are our eyes on the end goal. We see things and people outside the scope of our vision as distractions and setbacks.

Call to mind a time in your life when you were determined and unmoving. Remember how this feels in your body. Your head. Your chest. Your gut. Your hands.

The woman, who has a name but we do not know it, persists. Jesus compares her to a dog. The woman notes that, actually, she is being treated as even less than a dog--so stingy are the disciples, and most devastatingly, Jesus, in responding to her need.

And Jesus perhaps is shocked by her words, her character, her audacity to tell the truth and shatter the blinders he was using to dismiss her. This is a conversion moment for Jesus, one of the most intensely human portraits of Jesus. In this moment, Jesus sees the woman. He hears her. Her interruption allows Jesus to wake up and to respond with compassion, to widen his circle, to broaden his mission, to adjust his understanding of his own calling.

Sometimes, some days, and, if we are so very blessed, some years--we are Jesus in this moment, after seeing and hearing and taking seriously a woman whose name we do not know. We are Jesus, breaking out of ourselves. We are able to see the truth of love as expansive; we recognize that when we recognize the dignity of one, it does not subtract or negate the dignity of another. We are arrested in our tracks, convicted by the truth of our own indifference, willing ignorance, complicit bias, and we are compelled to cross and dismantle previously established borders. We wake up and see with startling clarity the actual person who is front of us, who has been asking for our attention, our companionship, our gifts, our belief. We wake up and we move. The best apology is changed behavior. Jesus owns his freedom to change, to choose a new response, to upend old patterns, to begin a new relationship. He pays attention. He is humbled.

Call to mind a time in your life when you felt convicted, converted, called to action. Remember what it feels like to accept a new truth, to take on a new reality, to respond with your life. Remember what it feels like to grow, to expand, to give, to love. In your head. Your chest, Your gut. Your hands.

Dominican Volunteers will spend this next year dedicated to the four pillars of Prayer, Community, Ministry and Study. Our hope is that in relationship this year you will remember the times that you yourself have been the daughter, the woman with a name no one remembered, the disciples. And that when you encounter the daughter, the woman, or the disciples in someone else, you remember the example of Jesus, of Dominic. We pray that you allow yourself to hear the stories of the students, the parents, the survivors, the abusers, the children, the hungry, enter into your own story, disrupt the path you “thought” you were on. Allow their story to enter yours so much that it changes yours as you live it. We pray that you are transformed by these relationships and the ever-continued awakening to the truth of our interconnectedness and the ever-present opportunity for change.

‘The Heart of Ministry is Relationship.' Jesus knew this. The woman and her daughter reminded him. Dominic knew this. That is why St. Dominic traveled by foot--to stay physically and literally grounded by putting himself in a position that would allow him to encounter others on his way. His life invited this kind of relational interruption. He knew that the destination was never more pressing than the person in front of him in any given moment, and so he chose to live in a way that would increase opportunities for connection and an expansion of shared wisdom, shared truth.

We give thanks today in this Eucharist for the encounter with one another made possible by our retreat here at Mariandale. We give thanks to the Dominican sisters who inspire and make possible DVUSA, and especially for the sisters that open their homes to the volunteers. We give thanks with hearts full of hope and eager anticipation for the 5 newest Dominican Volunteers and their commitment to respond to the Gospel with their lives.

Two years of Opportunity and Change

Second year Dominican Volunteer Holly Sammons serves with the Adrian Dominican Sisters, working in their Permaculture Office. DVUSA is grateful for your service, wisdom, and compassion Holly, and we wish you the very best in future endeavors.

Holly on a tour of the Capitol Building in Washington D.C.

I write this post with only about six weeks left as a Dominican Volunteer.  It feels as if a two year chapter in my life is closing and yet there are many lessons, relationships, and skills that I will take with me.  My first year as a Dominican Volunteer I worked with newly arrived refugees in Atlanta, GA.  During those 11 months I learned about resilience and hope from the clients I worked with.  I thought of the hardships and loss of these people as I dealt with my own losses.  I struggled to cope with the death of my father while being so far from everyone and everything I knew.  During the over nine months I was in Atlanta following my father’s death I received love and support from my Atlanta community and friends in the area.  I also learned about my own strength and power as I strove to continue to do my best each day.  I gained confidence from my ministry and an understanding of the refugee resettlement process in the U.S.  I was given many opportunities to grow during this time and did my best to take them. 

  Near the end of my first year as a Dominican Volunteer I began discerning a second year of service.  I struggled to know what to do next as grief continued to color my everyday life.  After some careful thinking I decided to do a second year as a Dominican Volunteer in Adrian, MI with the Adrian Dominican Sisters.  I wanted to continue to grow and be of service while also working to heal myself. 

Like my time in Atlanta, my time in Michigan has been filled with many great opportunities and people.    I have been welcomed by the Adrian Dominican Sisters and been blessed to learn about the work of a whole congregation of amazing women religious.  I work in the Adrian Dominican Motherhouse and mostly split my time between their Office of Justice, Peace and Integrity of Creation and their Permaculture Office.  Through my work with the Office of Justice, Peace and Integrity of Creation I have been able to travel to different events including the School of the Americas Watch Convergence at the Border in Arizona, the UN Commission on the Status of Women, and Ecumenical Advocacy Days in Washington D.C.  These events have opened my mind to new possibilities and ways of thinking.  I am so grateful for these incredible learning experiences.   

Through my work with the Permaculture Office I have expanded my knowledge of environmental issues and acquired some practical skills such as how to start seeds and plant.  I look forward to having my own home garden someday!

Throughout my time in Michigan ,I have continued to deal with my losses and tried to acknowledge the “progress” I have made.  Some days this is easier to do than others.  I have learned that grieving is much more complicated and messy that I ever realized when I began this journey but have moved forward with the help of family, friends and my communities in Atlanta and Adrian.